Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Turkey, Icecream and The Moon Face.


It's amazing the amount of things you can get done when you're avoiding writing. To name a few: Peel an avacado- and if you could see my botched attempt at peeling an avacado you'd understand the amount of time that actually took me. Work out- always the perfect diversion. Paint your nails. Update your Ipod- with every song imagineable. And the activity that has most prominently taken over my brain; FOOD.

But no folks, it didn't start, or end with Thanksgiving...I do what I like to call "The preliminary Thanksgiving" in order to maximize the holiday, I stomach stretch for about 3 days prior. The best stomach stretching foods include: CAKE, taquitos, all of Paula Deen's recipes- BUTTER, pizza, RICE, mint chocolate chip icecream and pasta. After you successfully consume all of the above items you will be able to fully enjoy Thanksgiving- as I did.

Unfortunately there are repercussions....something I'd like to call "The Moon Face"
I have this incredible talent of eating anything with sugar, carbs, or salt and magically, my face has an uncanny resemblance to a moon. Large and round. But glowing :) But large.

On the inside I am an obese child with an ravenous junk food tooth. And when unleashed...bringing the moon baby back to health is a bit of a challenge.

SO TODAY- I started anew...thankfully I'm also a bit obsessive compulsive and highly competitive with myself, so when on the "gym kick", "diet kick" or any other "KICK" I frequently kick around starts kickin', I'm full the f*ck out. No slacking. You couldn't pay me to slack.

While I was in the midst of my "avoid writing" activities, I did some ONDEMAND surfing and stumbled upon this dazzling little work out gem called: Carmen Electra StripTease. Oh yes. I had to try it. I'm like, "Ok...burn some calories and look hot doing it...bring it on baby."
SADLY, it didn't work out to be such a success. Partly due to the fact that half the work out consisted of warming up your wrists? I guess wrists would need to be warm for panty flinging, or dollar snatching. And also playing sexy in your hoodie and dad's sweatpants while mirroring Hot McHot Booby Carmen, doesn't do a whole lot for the self-esteem, or libido.

So here I am WRITING.
So many changes in my life have occured recently, and as blunt and honest as I tend to be, you may be shocked to know I do omit many things that happen. So catching up is in order. With all of these changes has come immense...HAPPINESS.
And with my new found happiness...I've adopted a hefty case of writers block.
Part of my wit, dry humor, observations....Surliness? Can be attributed to so much of the unhappiness I'd been experiencing...and also many of the experiences.
But, would I trademy happiness for some quips? I think not. I just need a change of strategy...and only through new experiences, are there new stories...and whether happy or sad, awkward and comedic experiences hang onto my coat tails.

Hope all of you ate yourself into a lazy stupor... Now lets KICK IT!

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