Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Too Much of a Good Thing is.....DELICIOUS.


"Why not seize the pleasure at once? How often is happiness destroyed by preparation."
Jane Austen



You bet, I did, in the most girly and cliched way possible- I have just quoted Jane Austen. The quote hit me immediately and I found it interesting that instead of ending it with a question mark, she ended it with a period. As in, this is fact.

Interesting when you think about it, what happens when we over plan and event; map out the details to the most minute and trivial specifics, play "what if" games in our heads, then, instead of enjoying the outcome we're often so ridden with the stress that it took to get there, thereby making the entire process agonizing and not pleasureable at all. Often, we place such an empasis on wanting something to be great, that we aren't OK with everything just being good. Or just being at all. When the person gets so caught up in the outcome the entire motivation behind the wanting of the end result is lost completely.

Instead of enjoying the meal you worry about the money you had to spend to pay for it. Instead of keeping sight of the reason why you're planning the event, why you're getting married, why you're celebrating- whatever, you're busy focusing on the frustration, the stress or the pimple. WHATEVER IT IS, it is inane, but it has become the main event.
Rather than appreciating the way something made you feel you start to question your frivolity, or your judgment. Taking a joy ride in the middle of the day or ditching that "thing, that that person wanted you to go to" is laden with guilt. You repremand yourself for being doing something so insignificant.

It's as if we have this stimuli on PLEASURE, as if pleasure is bad. If we succumb to hedonism we are being reckless or dangerously impetuous. The process of feeling guilt associated with pleasure is set in our brains so much that instead of reveling in the euphoria of something that makes you spring about with glee and stupid grinning, we rush at the first chance to throw our hands into the pot and messy things up. What about the saying, "Don't fix it if it ain't broke" Yes, it's country but so what...if things are good we shouldn't be waiting for the giant shoe to fall out of the sky and knock us down. Or when people say, "Yep, everything is going so well...I' just waiting for something bad too happen....TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE." Yes, if you say so my friend. Have fun being miserable when "the bad thing" comes along.

When your body starts saying, "Oh, this feels nice." or "I may just sleep ten more minutes..." it says, "This is so good, it must be a sin." Our brains have been warped to condemn ourselves for having too much fun. Since fun must be fruitless. The phrases, "It's not supposed to be fun, it's WORK." and "Well, life's not always fair." "You're having too much fun...." Having too much fun, what the fuck does that mean!? And in America, work better be fun because in order to survive (for most) it's your entire existence. You know what isn't fun, dying and looking at your life and saying..."Well gee, that wasn't that much fun, glad to go." I'd like to have a sit down with whoever started saying, "....it's sinful" when someone licked chocolate from their fingers and said..."this is so good..so good it's....(loss for words)" SINFUL? That would have hardly been my response. Whoever decided that decadence, JOY, sheer delight, were useless emotions, were sorely mistaken.

Seizing the pleasure for me would mean: sleeping until noon when I felt like it, pulling over the car when there's a hill worth rolling down, eating Australian strawberry flavored licorice, that extra glass of wine, sex- all. damn. day., a spoonful of rich chocolate ICING, risking rejection and telling someone I want them, singing LOUDLY, screaming- because it feels AMAZING, licking my fingers, letting someone grab me-kiss me-squeeze me and squeezing them back. Vacationing more often, not feeling obligated, spicy peppers and pungent perfumes, dark chocolate and leaving my phone at home for the day. Staying an extra hour or leaving early, curling up or spazzing out. Taking my guard down, crushing it beneath my feet and running bare naked through my entire world. More flesh and more skin. Sweaty palms and butterflies. Hearts skipping beats, and skipping. Just one more time, again, a little extra and side of that.
Pleasure is something that I let consume me, JUST BECAUSE. And that, is fine by me.


If you were to seize the pleasure today, what would it be???












47 comments:

emmaenlighted said...

AMEN!! You CALLED it. I love the way you think, I swear, you're one of my inspirations.

If I could seize the moment, I'd be flying right out back to Spain to enjoy my summer and be with my man.

But you know, there are preparations and I need to wait until September. Bah.

Until then, you can bet your ass I'll be enjoying it over here in California as much as I can :)

Maxie said...

I would eat the whole tub of hummus in my fridge. Yum.

brookem said...

this is so very TRUE! it reminds me of the section of eat, pray, love where she is in italy, and feels guilty for just doing... nothing. how she talks about how as americans, we can't simply enjoy just doing what we want, when we want, because we're all too caught up in the idea that we are giving something else up instead. that we don't deserve it.

your ideas of pleasure? sound AMAZING. ill need to give some thought to mine. though on top of the list would most definitely be cocktails at noon, speaking my mind without fear, always- sex in the mornings, going for the real thing instead of low fat crap, and spending that extra money on the expensive brand and not feeling bad about it.

JK said...

Beautiful.....

I think I try to live like this but all of the times I can't are related to money issues. If there really were money trees, I'd be almost completely a pleasure fiend.

Lyla Lou said...

I totally feel you on the sleeping in til noon thing. I'd love to just skip work, hang out at the pool all day with my guy, eat a cheeseburger, have drinks on the patio of my favorite bar with all my friends and curl up early with a good movie and my guy. Wait, I did that last week. Except for the cheeseburger.

Kyla Bea said...

Here here! This reminds me of the differences between how canadians and americans work, and how people in Europe work. In north america holiday time, family time, maternity leave time is all an inconvenience because it's more appropriate to commute 3 hours a day than be with people who make.

Talk about repression!

If I could I would stay in bed all day, watch movies, drink tea, and knit. And when I was tired of that I would go lie in a sun beam.

Great post!

Rebecca said...

rent a car and head to the ocean. i need more ocean in my life.

Melissa said...

I would fall asleep under the apple trees in my favorite orchard.

And hi, by the way, I'm a new reader! ;)

ashley said...

Carpe Diem.

I just need to live a little.

JanelleGrace said...

I would like to curl up in bed with the sun shining in and just take a long nap with my boyfriend. He's gone all week and sure, I got our twin-sized bed to myself, but I just wish he was there.

I've decided to not worry about things and that is how I will enjoy life. I didn't worry about moving to New York, I am not going to worry about my job, I am just going to live and be happy and if I am super poor when I am old from no planning, I think I will at least have an amazing life to look back on.

bakingwithplath said...

Girllll....PREACH! I LOVE this post. I was just thinking about this yesterday, and you put my thoughts into words, only BETTER. I hate how we are taught to associate pleasure with guilt. Guilty pleasure?? Why does pleasure have to make us feel guilty??

ChasingParadise said...

For me, on this very day, it would mean ignoring every single one of my boss's million emails, phone calls, and instant messages and just saying FUCK IT. It would mean taking a two hour lunch break just BECAUSE and enjoying a nice creme brulee during that time.

It would mean leaving at 3 because I can.

Sadly, not the case for today. But I am trying to use your whole approach/idea into planning my wedding. I'm not going to let it stress me out. Not even the fact that B and I have to pay for it ourselves could ruin it for me!

Britt said...

How true, that we often plan our lives instead of living it. Sometimes I feel like I'm missing out on today because I'm planning tomorrow.

I would ditch work, fly to T, spend the whole day in bed, eat take out. :)

NYCPonderings Chick said...

ahhh yes, i always love that extra glass of wine...followed by some screaming ( the good kind of course) ..and I think you should go ahead and let yourself eat some frosting!

Erin said...

I would get up from this desk I hate so much, walk out of this office I hate so much and never look back. Then i'd go treat myself to a chocolate shake even though it's only 9 am
and lay by the pool all day and read a book.

The Feedos said...

If I could sieze something today, it would be you. I would just like to sit down and spend time with you. Because that was one of the most inspiring things I've read in a really long time. Thank you.

Coconut said...

I would quit and pursue designing my own line full time. I would sleep in, layout with cocktails, and make a romantic dinner dressed in sexy lingerie for my boyfriend.

Ahh, great post!

Jess said...

This is beautiful. I would be all about lots of unhealthy food, probably. Not as romantic as your list.

Jessica Sutton said...

thank you for this - i needed it as i started to get all guilty about how i called in sick for a "me-day" today...

i also agree with kyla bea - it's an american thing. drives me crazy. maybe it's in the water, haha.

oh and a quick question - the strawberry flavored australian liquorish - from trader joes?? if so, i'm effing obsessed with it and buy 3 boxes at a time, not blinking an eye ;)

Dolce said...

Jane Austen is girly, but so damn good! If I was to seize pleasure, I would pack my bags, my dog, and husband and move to Costa Rica without telling a soul and live the like locals in total happiness.

*slaps self awake*

Hillary said...

Gah. This post spoke to me. I am currently living in the messiness of planning a wedding (and hating it) instead of enjoying and celebrating the fact that I get to marry a kick-ass dude.
If I were to seize the pleasure today I would run away to Mexico and get married on the beach. Ah, dreams.

A Margarita said...

To lie on the grass in Central Park in jean cut offs and a wife beater with a chilled bottle of champagne and a sexy man within reach to wrestle with ;)

Princess of the Universe said...

Excellent Post! I love Jane.

I have 2 options today: clean, pay some bills, do some paperwork, prep for my new job.
OR
Go to the mall, buy new clothes, see a movie, eat ice cream.

I'm inspired to go with option 2 now!

notbubbly said...

this post is brilliant. i find the most fun i ever have is when it is unexpected. planning parties is fun but then the actual event isn't always fun. unlike those random days and nightss of letting loose and seeing where the day takes you.

i am seizing the moment, this exact moment, by blasting the girly music i never listen to with "the guys" at work and singing along.

Rhoobs said...

i would finally by the freakin plane ticket to NYC and go exploring. i feel like i need some east coast in my life.

heidikins said...

Great post! Love it!

If I had the funds to sieze today, I would be packing my things into a suitcase, heading to the airport and taking the next international flight. And it would be GLORIOUS!

xox

the lockeness monster said...

I would walk out of work right now and never look back.
I'd go to Philadelphia and pick up the man, then drive across the country for the entire summer, and see every random damn town there is.
Then I'd move my explorations across the Atlantic.

The whole "wind in your hair, not a care in the world" cliche.
Sigh.

Mel Heth said...

Great post.

I'd get up every morning go to the beach, then spend the day reading and writing in the sun.

Chelsea Talks Smack said...

the feedos- thank youuuuuu that is the nicest thing someone has said in a long time :) I appreciate the comment

melissa- HI! Thanks for coming by, hope to see you hear more often!

Katelin said...

oh wow your whole pleasure list sounds amazing.

if i was to indulge i would leave work and just drive to see where i end up. no plans whatsoever. just go. that would be amazing.

April said...

I loved this post so much I read it twice. I almost went all Norma Rae standing on my desk with a big sign that said PLEASURE. Except I thought I might look a little weird and pervy if I did that.

And never make excuses for quoting Austen. Regardless of being girly or cliche, she was a GENIUS.

Now I'm gonna go eat a cookie. Screw it, I'm gonna eat two.

Sizzle said...

I need to read this today. I'm so damn grumpy!

I would...walk across the street for an ice cream cone, go home and pack myself a picnic and go to the park by my house to read and just chill, I would forget my to do list and watch a silly movie that would make me laugh, I would take a hot bath and then walk around naked in my house.

Ashley said...

AMEN girl! I love it! Ahhh, I started out the day dreaming... so I shall continue the theme! Right now I'd be in a hammock on the beach with a good book and a frozen margarita. Stick an umbrella in it too, what the hell!

Jonah K. Haslap said...

Oh how I'd love to seize the pleasure today. Unfortunately Jake Gyllenhall is still "straight." Maybe tomorrow.

Camels & Chocolate said...

Bathing in a sea of chocolate, as simple as that. George Clooney being there would be nice, too, but I'm not going to push it.

M said...

so true! I heart your post!

Bayjb said...

So true all the things you said here. My pleasure would be sleeping in, eating like I didn't have to worry about gaining weight and shopping like I didn't have to pay the bills. Heaven.

*DesignerGirl24* said...

I would eat an entire cheesecake while laying on the beach in Fiji. Ahh. Fun topic and insightful! So many good points.

Dani said...

I'm so much happier today after doing what I wanted -- my (not-so) secret pleasures are pedicures, margaritas (yum, tequila) and chatting on the phone with my BFF. All three I did today -- and it couldn't even ruin a stressful day at work and a fight with a family member.

moxie said...

In a word? Masturbation.

Excuse me.

poodlegoose said...

I love that Jane Austen quote.

And that picture is confusing me. I can't decide if it's making me want to eat something sweet or figure out if that's actually a real woman. :)

And then I would eat ice cream sandwiches and Sour Patch Kids until I explode.

utopia said...

for starters i'd love, so love to be able to put my phone off for one whole day and knowing that i was unreachable and boss can't hound me.
sleeeepppp late.
shop as much as i want. no debts to be paid.
sigh!!!!!

Melody said...

I would swim in a vat of chocolate and peanut butter with my mouth open (or just eat a reese's penut butter cup) and lounge on my deck with a pile of books for weeks on end until I had discovered every author worth discovering. I would dance until 4 am every night and sleep until my body told me it was time to wake up. I would fly on a one way ticket to France with nothing but my H(usband) T(o) B(e) and a backpack full of loose fitting clothes and spearmint gum.

Strawberry Swirl said...

what i wouldnt give for a summer vaca thats actually a summer vaca. sleeping in and doing absolutely nothing. traveling. Mexico sounds good this time of year. so is bora bora. mmm... clear blue water. tropical food. that would be a nice day.

i think religion had a big part in the matter. not religion itself, but the people behind it(i.e. the pilgrims).

Lauren said...

I love this idea. It's true, we prepare so much we forget what we're preparing for. It looses it's pleasure.

So forgot preparation! I don't know what i'd do, but i'd love a day when I just didn't CARE.

Marcheline said...

It would be the leather jacket Angelina wore during "Wanted". It's on ebay. Bidding is up past $7K.



Sigh.

Guess it'll have to be that crumb cake.

- M

wontletlifedefineme said...

I'm already doing it. I slept in and it's 4pm and I'm still in my pyjamas (I had a crazy busy week and weekend so I felt I deserved it).

 
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