Thursday, March 4, 2010

I can sleep when I'm dead...or during that "really important" conference call.


"Chels, this is what you asked for....be grateful."

I sprawled myself out on the couch and whined like a little bitch about being "too busy" while I kicked my little black boots in the air and shook my dangled earrings in childlike fury. I didn't want to look at the 7,000 emails that were piled up and the cell phone that I didn't have for three weeks (thanks to a little spilt milk in the tracking ball) wasn't missed either. I didn't want another text, or a phone call- I didn't want to feel the pressure, of "immediate response" when your Blackberry starts buzzing and people are on the other end waiting on your answer. I didn't want another social obligation, or event that needed to be "fit in..."

...all I wanted to do was lay down, on my cozy couch- and breathe. Maybe fall in and out of naps while watching reruns of Property Virgins and drinking orange juice from the carton.

I was feeling the strain of needing to be a "yes" person all the time, so much so that I was HOPING for a cold, or the stomach flu, or a funeral- yeah, (I'm morbid and horrible, I know)- so I wouldn't have to come up with an excuse as to why I couldn't "make it", or why an assignment was late, or why I didn't have enough energy to squeeze in a rehearsal....my stock phrases were; I'm stressed, I'm overwhelmed, I'm too busy...and fuck, I'm gonna die. Using certain phrases consistently, over a period of time- no matter what it is, will eventually make that belief TRUE.

All the things I was saying about my circumstances could easily be turned into a positive phrase, if I changed my perspective.

My Love said, "You asked for ABUNDANCE....and that is what you're getting." I could look at everything as "overwhelming" or I could simply start saying "thank you."I could get off the couch, check the emails, head out the door with a fucking smile on my face or I could sit there and loathe an event that hasn't even occurred yet, which is useless. Receiving my abundance with gratitude makes it so much easier to get through the moments where you feel like there's "too much" and that "too much" is so much better defined as living a FULL life. Even though it's hard to do...shouldn't that be the goal?

Sure, there's gonna be times when we need to reevaluate, say "no" when we're bending before we break, or our priorities aren't lining up with the end goals....or, we simply don't want to sit through another pointless fucking phone call, lunch date or distant-cousins-softball match. But the for most part, BUSY IS GOOD. BUSY MEANS YOU'RE IN DEMAND.

... I started thinking about my life, my priorities, and all those times when I felt like everything was stagnant- when I was living in the stark reality of waiting for life to happen to me, rather than being a conscious creator in life happening because I'm engaged in it and dictating its direction. I think when there wasn't enough work, or creativity- when I felt like I was scraping from the bottom of an empty well....and now, that well is overflowing, I'm complaining that the water is running my shoes. Or something like that.

Fuck the shoes, and the flood....we want a flood! We want to fill FULFILLED and overwhelmed and FULL...and more is better than nothing at all. Bring on the rain and all that soppy goodness.

Right now is when we should be worn out, we should be packed and crowded- active and present. Reminding ourselves that everyday, we spend bemoaning ourselves, our lovers, our home or our circumstances we're wasting vital time where we could A. change it, or B. be grateful, for everything is fleeting, good and bad.

Saying "I'm stressed" just reinforces that into a reality.... so instead I'll be; engulfed, overcome, submerged in prosperity. AHHH, that feels so much better.


How do you react when you're "overwhelmed?"





85 comments:

Jen said...

GREAT post! OMG... digging this post so much. It is all about perspective, and I'm taking away that "we can either a.) change it or b.) be thankful, because everything is fleeting." So great.

THANK YOU, CHELS!

Kristin Quinn said...

I am having an annoying day so instead I'll be thankful this day isn't over yet and turn it around and make the best of it.

Thank you. This was the perfect post for me to read at this very moment!

Kez said...

Great post :)
I was getting overwhelmed a couple of weeks ago. I felt so down and out. My house became a mess. I didn't have my priorities straight. I whined a lot.
However, when I decided to shut up and get on with it, life really did feel a whole lot better :)

Matt said...

Well I get stressed when Im overwhelmed, so I kind of pick and choose what I want to do when I want to do it.

cause it gets ugly when Im stressed.

but really? Im more of a take it easy kind of guy anyway. Always have been.

Doniree said...

This rings as true right now as it did 12 hours ago when we discussed this. I love how you say you're "receiving your abundance with gratitude," and I feel like I'm doing the same thing. My world is overflowing with greatness right now and I want to FEEL and experience ALL OF IT. Because hell - I asked for it!

Faiza said...

I confess, I watch The Young and the Restless to wind down from overwhelming days.

Chelsea Talks Smack said...

faiza- that's perfect "wind down" television

matt- fuck stress, arg. Yes, you're definitely laid back

Doni- I love talking about these thigns with you wee!

Kristin- I'm glad it was timely for you!! ;)

jen-well thank you :)

Eternal Blast said...

Overwhelmed!!!
We must be in sync, last week was full of everything including an emotional roaller coaster about my photography work..
Big f***** story about publishing some of my images..and how the censored some stuff that is just as innocent as a baby..
I guess, shouldn't complain because the ripple effect is making me a little bit more known tan before..
Cheers to abundance, and all the stuff that brings with it!!!!

the "L" spot said...

Oh gosh! I work 68hrs and go to school full time! And I'm only 20.

But anytime I feel like jumping off a cliff (which is quite often) I tell myself how lucky I am to have a job and to be able to be in school!

It does suck sometimes and on those times I think its okay to whine and cry!

Hope Chella said...

Thanks :D xo

http://hopechella.blogspot.com/

Johana Hill said...

I crack. But I'm trying to learn to take everything with a pinch of salt, and not to take EVERYTHING seriously.

When I feel like a break I take one, with no regard to the consequences. :( I live by the saying "When we reach that bridge we'll cross it."

And by the way Property Virgins? Love it too, plus Mike Holmes! ;p

ashlina said...

i blog. it makes me feel better...heehee
thanks for stopping by my blog. you are the sweetest. will be following yours. LOVE the title.

The warrior in me said...

Chels! You are the best motivation i get here- i am SO in love with your blog!

When i'm overwhelmed, i shut off my cell-phone, pull the plug to the land-line off, throw my feet up in the air, eat, watch a film, sleep- privacy is sacred. When i'm feeling "Oh so lovely" in something like a week, i feign ignorance- no excuses whatsoever- "blame the phone company, i have no freaking clue what you're talking about!!"

Haha :D (TRY IT!)

erica@ moth design+luxe life said...

So glad you commented on my Lucite love... now I gots to say me loves you!
So my thoughts... well, have to watch what you wish for, busy is good but can make you throw up in your throat a little at times. (what I call "go away nausea")
As a single mum to 5 boys, 3 lovely canine daughters, and a house being renovated, being fabulous keeps me going.
I'll be checking back! xo Erica

mimi charmante said...

I LOVE this post - and your writing style! And what a great perspective on being grateful for what we have - crazy as it might be...
xx

Gina said...

This happens to me all the time:
getting stressed and overwhelmed. Sometimes, I get to the point where I just can't take it anymore. But you make a good point about how when we're busy, it means we're in demand. When we're busy, we are living each day to the fullest, and now is the prime time to be doing that.

Life is short; therefore, I'll sleep when I'm dead. =)

Thanks for yet another great post.

Lindsey said...

This post was the most perfect thing I could've read. For the past three years I've been spread so thin, doing more than I've ever done for myself, my family, my job, pretty much everything and everyone. At first it was fun, I was playing "grown-up" and was BUSY, which was awesome compared to young, broke, unemployed, bored and anxious about my future. Lately, though, I've been feeling burnt out and complaining and stressed and fried...but you're so right - I should be channeling that into OVERCOME and IN DEMAND! Above all, especially with the current state of the world (and seemingly everyone I talk to), I should be feeling blessed and grateful. At least I have these opportunities and I'm young, healthy and energetic enough to (try to) balance it all.

Perspective!

Chelsea said...

I love this post because it happens to everyone. We all get overwhelmed. Usually, when I have too much on my plate, I just shut down and don't feel like doing anything but laying around and watching tv/reading/etc. It's true, though, that it's all in your perspective!

Becks said...

Wow, that totally could've been me writing that post right now.

I know how you feel about having a sense of being completely overwhelmed, but at least knowing it means you're "needed."

Sometimes it'd be just as nice to wake up and wonder what the heck to do with a blank agenda...unfortunately my schedule is never empty.

Make time for down time though, in the end, even taking an hour or two off, is healthier than pushing yourself to check the last thing off your to-do list.

Thanks for stopping by my blog.

Nahl said...

I am soo thankful I have something to do-unlike those two years when I BEGGED God to give me something to do. Now I am gonna get off my ass and start working. :)

J-Diggety said...

Omg, YES. What a great post!! I go through this too... when I have nothing to do, I whine and complain about it, but when I'm overflowing with to-do's, I whine and complain... but lately I've been trying to remember to be grateful for the busy-ness, because idle boredom is much, much worse...
xoxo J

The Neo-Traditionalist said...

I can totally relate to feeling overwhelmed! To me, it's all about a bubble bath. Though even then I still sometimes feel lousy... Hope life settles down --- love your writing, you've such talent! XOXO

Kiera said...

beautiful! you're so quotable. I want to steal quotes from this and like, put it on my fb page. :)

i flip the fuck out when im stressed.

Cinnamon said...

I cry. But I'm really trying right now to learn to live in the now, and not worry about the future but just take it one day, one hour at a time. Just take it all in a little at a time trying not to let your mind worry about the future and you'll feel much better.
I'm reading The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle and if I can make any sense out of all the confusing shit in that book that will be it.

http://thebusiestbee.blogspot.com/

Herding Cats said...

How do I react when I'm overwhelmed? Like a spaz. I don't do well with it, and I HAVE to have "me" time in order to function.

Caro said...

I take everything too seriously, driving and singing on the way home calms me down.

Ellen said...

I'm totally jealous! I want to be overwhelmed, overworked, over...EVERYTHING! I want my well to be overflowing! I want it all, all, all. OK, I'm not in a Warren G video. Sigh. Yes, be thankful for your blessings.

http://www.firednfabulous.blogspot.com/

WannabeVirginia W. said...

Drink lots of wine.

tonyadesigns said...

I know EXACTLY how you are feeling!

theOtherStacy said...

I don't think I've ever left a message telling you how much I enjoy your posts! Because I really do!

And when I get overwhelmed...my energy just rises up to meet it (and if that doesn't work, caffeine sure does) I normally get so excited that things are working out that I don't let myself feel anything else...

Melissa said...

2 words: Jack Daniels.

Elizabeth Marie said...

SAME BOAT!! Same overwhelmed, but immensely blessed boat. Life is good. You're a rockstar. :)

Chelsea Talks Smack said...

erica- WOW , you are a rockstar!!

melissa and wannabe virginia- DUDE, yo guys are speaking my language.

CuppyCakes said...

usually I cry when I get overwhelmed. It's like a reaction... it just happens and before I know it I'm snotty and convulsing while I try to talk.

I'm kind of an awkward person.

Alice said...

If there weren't times when I felt overwhelmed by life... christ I would be bored. So when I am, I just try to suck it up and let it run through me until it bubbles, rises and then spills out onto the page. Yes, often I write best when feeling overwhelmed. And to be bored would just not be living... oh, and I bake 'gooey chocolate stack' and watch crappy property programmes ;-)

Thanks for stopping by my blog and for your sweet comment; I think I'm going to love it here...

xox Dany said...

great post! I loved it! At the moment all i want is sitting at the couch by night, cozy with some series or movies but then I miss going out to any events, so I probably need to kick my ass to get stressed in my personal life too haha! - and thank you for your comment on my blog!

Sunshine Sarah said...

Hey! Thanks for the comment on my blog... yes, that day was really fun and funny! :D

Meghan said...

Just like everyone else, I am feeling majorly overwhelmed myself. Usually, I just whine and cry and beg my hubby to do something for me - he usually shuts me up with a bottle of wine. But I needed this BIG TIME. So thanks lady!

flipflopsintherain said...

Hee, you crack me up. I totally plan my funeral when I'm busy and crazy and CAN'T SLOW DOWN, so it's good to know there are other morbid personalities in the world.

Also, LOVE the picture you used for this one. Gorgeous.

C'est La Vie said...

For some reason I love the feeling of being busy but ONLY when I'm doing it all, if I'm being lazy and not wanting to do anything then I"M SO STRESSED!
So...it's hard...
Get some Vitamin D, it helps with stress...seriously...new discovery of mine :)
Good luck, I hope you have some time to relax!
Love that pic btw

Liz said...

This is EXACTLY how I feel right now too. Thank you for putting it in perspective for me :)

jessie said...

It frustrates me when people around me hear their phone ring and leap up looking for it like the person on the other end of the line will expire if they don't answer. I understand needing to answer the phone if its work but can't a friend wait a little while if you've already committed to hanging out with someone else? Sorry, just had to have a little phone rant there. ;)

Heather said...

"...all I wanted to do was lay down, on my cozy couch- and breathe. Maybe fall in and out of naps while watching reruns of Property Virgins and drinking orange juice from the carton."

First of all, Property Virgins is one of my favorite shows. Second, This is what I do on a daily basis when I get off work. :) Okay maybe not daily but whatever.

Miss Angie said...

I get stressed out when I'm overwhelmed and end up hermiting myself away from everything. I hate that!

But I too, need to learn to say yes and enjoy the flood!

Margarita said...

I think a lot of people are like this - we all want things to happen and when they finally do we complain about them, we're overwhelmed, when really we should be embracing it. Great post!

Chelsea Talks Smack said...

cuppycakes- dont worry friend, so am i ;)

Tiffany said...

I'm watching property virgins right now.

p.s. I'm totally feelin' you on your post...

Amy said...

This was such a great post...and so perfect for the kind of week I have been having. Thank you!

Your blog is wonderful!!

xoxo
Amy

htt://thebargainhunterextraordinaire.blogspot.com

Diane said...

Nice inspiring text. I always feel good when my life is abundant, I feel like I matter, like I'm doing something important with my life!

Have a fun weekend!

kiss

SilverNeurotic said...

I kind of shut down when things are over whelming. I know there's a ton of stuff that I need/should do, yet, it takes a very large amount of motivation to get those things done. It annoys me, but that's how I'm wired I guess.

yousaidifferent said...

i usually take a nap, it helps so much.

i love st. vincents hair! how adorable is she? i bet she was great live!

Christina said...

thanks so much, i love san francisco.

i appreciate your perspective, its so true. i'm glad you commented on mine so i could read yours!

hope you enjoy your weekend!

ErikaKay said...

I can completely relate. There has been many times where I wished that my obligations could just be brushed aside, maybe an "I'm sick" meant that you could forget anything that happens when you are sick, and you can truly have a break, and not spend time after your sick catching up! I play loud happy music, drink lots of coffee and get through it. :)

Jess said...

Wow - I totally know what you mean! I loved this post... and I love your outlook ;)

When I'm stressed, I tend to shop online - bad habit, but it definitely de-stresses me!

~Jess

Lindsay said...

That's so true! I find myself complaining about all the work projects I'm juggling, but have to put myself in check because I would much rather have TOO MUCH to do, than NOTHING to do (and not have a job). Why are we so quick to start viewing a blessing as an annoyance?!

Can't say I have any great wisdom on how to handle feelings of being overwhelmed. I tend to bottle it up inside and then it comes pouring out all at once in crazy tears upon breaking a nail one day.

The Non-Student said...

Ah, just reading the title of the post made me feel better. I've felt under a lot of pressure lately, mostly self-induced, and I find it to be the most unmotivating thing ever.

But, when I'm thinking clearly, I say to myself, I am doing "A." When I finished "A" I will do "B." And I don't let my mind go any farther than that.

If you have any brilliant insights, let me know. :-)

abby said...

amen i hear ya!

Heather Rose said...

I tend to ignore the overwhelming hordes, deny that I'm taking on too much, say "Yeah, sure!" to even more, have a panic attack, find out I've not been having panic attacks, but have an irregular heart beat, end up in the hospital getting cold gooey goodness smeared on my chest for an echo cardiogram and listening to a doctor tell me that I'm "wound pretty tight". That's been my week. Oy. I feel ya.

Jess said...

I get grumpy and take it out on my boyfriend over the silliest things. Something I'm trying to work on though I promise.

Cindy said...

Hi Chelsea
just got lost reading your back posts and I have to say you made me laugh several times. thanks for visiting my mex cooking blog! have you tried the habanero salsa yet??

Meg said...

Hmmm. I like to say that I mediate and do yoga but FUCK when I'm overwhelmed I freak the fuck out for a good 2-4.5 minutes and then I figure it out. I thrive on being busy. I usually feel more overwhelmed when I'm only a little busy or not busy at all. I know, it doesn't make sense, I'm just an bass-akwards kinda person.

xomeg

Karisa Tells All said...

I've had the opposite problem lately: I'm so used to being busy that as soon as I had some free time I felt guilty and tried to come up with something constructive to do. The grass really is greener everywhere else.

Dancing Branflake said...

I love this post. Umm... I'm pretty much the least busy person ever. It's a phase I hope. I miss being busy. Until I really am.

Ticky and Mimi said...

Chelsea,
Thanks so much for stopping by my blog! When I'm overwhelmed I find it necessary to meditate (even for five minutes) and squeeze in some yoga. I really helps to center me.

Best of luck with everything!!
Kelli

Melly said...

When I'm overwhelmed, I prioritize. Things are grouped, and let me know what to focus on:

Immediate.
Must-get-done-today items. Top Priority.

Sanity Savers.
Friends, Painting, D., Relax, Refresh, Rehydrate. Must have at least one in each day. TV-time doesn't count.

Tomorrows.
Must get done tomorrow, don't have to think about until then. They're on a list in my planner, which I'll see first thing.

Ongoing.
Long-term projects, work on a little, then move on.

Cut from the list.
Things I thought I had to do, but can really be forgotten or delegated to someone else.

...and lots of hugs!

Mom in Boyland said...

I really can relate to your post today. I have had many periods of my life feeling exactly how you do. Today I would kill to be overwhelmed, too busy, fulfilled. I would be in bliss if opportunities were knocking down my door and my phone was off the hook. Enjoy it girl. You are the creator.

Kellz said...

I react like a crazy-ass bitch.
I go into a caffeine-induced traumatic angry sexy state of being.
When I'm overwhelmed...that's what my boyfriend loves the most..cause I'm like the a sex fiend overwhelmed and I take it out on him.
But when I feel accomplished and overwhelmed...I usually react with a hot bath and a disney movie marathon...hahahahahah!

Poppy Gets a Life said...

I am so much happier when I am busy, but I know how quickly it can overwhelm me! Ah well, the grass is always greener...

Poppy xox

Shayna said...

Loving this post... and the title of the post most of all! When I get overwhelmed, once I get done migraining, taking heavy tranquilizer level migraine medication, and chugging a diet coke and dunkin donuts breakfast sandwich and/or McDonald's chicken nugget happy meal to bring my mind back to functioning, I tend to just duck and cover --- I work through it without stopping to think about how stressed I am... because thinking about my stress level kicks the migraine cycle (see above) off again.

Now linking to you from my blog - http://ShaynaLeahK.wordpress.com

LambAround said...

When I'm overwhelmed, I ignore my emails and phone messages and go to the mall or to a movie, just on my own :)

http://lambaround.blogspot.com

Meg said...

Love this sentiment. I try to breathe it all in rather than hold my breath.

Meg said...

(and thanks for checking out my blog!)

hannahkaty.com said...

I react in the same way. I stomp my feet, hiss and cry when I am too busy. But putting it into perspective you realize that there is so much abundance and so many good things all around ya, it makes you look at things differently. Loved this post.

Best,

Hannah Katy

Elizabeth said...

Here's another comment for you to read :)

When I get overwhelmed, I automatically imagine how it could be worse. That usually cures me right up.

Ruth said...

Love this post! I definitely need my alone time to recoup.

Thanks for stopping by!

meleah rebeccah said...

"How do you react when you're "overwhelmed?"

Well, I usually just make a list of everything that needs to get done, and then I do One Thing At A Time, and every time I finish a task, I cross it off my list. And before I know it I start to feel a sense of accomplishment and NOT overwhelmed.

confessionsofaperfectionist said...

Oh sister friend I hear ya. Just like you said, we complain when we have time and we complain when we are busy. I'm also working on that being grateful part. Thanks for reminding me to look at things in a different light. Love you for that :)

Shannon of ** Happiness Is...** said...

Love that - "we want the flood". I need to remind myself that next time I get overwhelmed. Glad things are happening for you Chelsea! :) xo

Lady V said...

Congrats on being featured blogger! Love the blog, the post was awesome! As a mom, I'm always stressed, overwhelmed! The joys of life;)

nichole said...

I struggle with this all the time. As a freelance writer, I get nervous when projects run thin, but then out of the blue I am too busy to blink. I am a stranger to moderation.

Sometimes I just want to get off this train and go sell apples or something.

jessica said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
jessica said...

I freeze and give it all the big "fuck it". Not exactly the sanest thing in the world but hey, I'm working on it. :)

I read this today and it seemed to be fitting: “Vision without action is a daydream. Action without vision is a nightmare.” -Japanese Proverb

redmenace said...

Such demand. It's so flattering! Lovely blog. Glad to find you. When I'm overwhelmed, I really shut down. So bad. Exercise makes me feel better-- and food, der.

Amanda West said...

Haha! Glad to hear things are working out for you.

But every once in awhile a person needs some time to breathe...

But having a positive attitude definately helps!

Katie said...

How do I react when I'm feeling overwhelmed?

I take a break and read your blog.

 
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